The world of golf stopped spinning on its axis this week – an almost unprecedented gap in the modern schedule appeared – so my standard four days of following leaderboards has had to be replaced by something different.

Many serious punters become creatures of routine, building their week around the sports on which they like to focus, and this sudden autumnal cessation of golfing hostilities has left me flapping like a canary. No DP World Tour golf, no PGA Tour golf and no LIV Golf – a scenario which typically occurs only when Santa Claus is trying to squeeze his enormous sack down various sooty chimneys.

How do normal people – who do not give a monkey’s about golf – spend Thursdays, Fridays, Saturdays and Sundays? How do people function without eagles, birdies, pars, bogeys and others impacting four-sevenths of their waking hours?