A dad who spent over £100k on bets and says he “lost everything” is now helping other gambling addicts to quit through TikTok videos.
James Nixon, 30, who works in business development and lives in Andover, Hampshire, spent three years couch surfing after losing his home, relationship and children due to a gambling addiction which saw him lose thousands of pounds each month.
Having quit in 2018, he relapsed when the coronavirus pandemic saw his addiction meetings halted – and it was not until July 2022 that he managed to get it under control again.
Now James, who has two children aged seven and 10 whom he did not wish to name, uses social media to help others end their gambling habits – posting about his own experiences to encourage addicts to quit.
James said: “My pay used to go into my bank account at around three in the morning and, by five or six, I’d be asking people for money because I’d spent everything.
“I don’t know exactly how much I’ve lost throughout my addiction but it is definitely over £100,000.”
He recalls how he first became hooked on gambling as a teenager growing up in a seaside town surrounded by arcades before the addiction escalated into adulthood, when he used money, needed for food and bills for his family, to place football bets.
James said: “I started going to the arcades when I was about 16. My friends used to hang around there and play on the games.
“For them, it was a bit of fun to pass the time but for me, I got really into it and played them loads.”
He added: “Then, I went to the bookies with my ex-girlfriend’s dad and we placed a couple of bets. I had quite a big win and from there, I was hooked.”
James began regularly placing bets on online sports, particularly tennis and football.
He said: “At first, I was making excuses as to why I had no money and why I needed to borrow from people but over time, people started getting suspicious.”
He added: “I couldn’t hide it any longer, when I started getting spotted at the bookies or gambling related things would pop up on my phone.”
At the time, James was living with his then-partner.
He said: “She knew I was gambling a lot because I would talk about how winning the latest bet would solve our money worries.”
He added: “I would ask her for money to place bets when I ran out and gambling became the start of a lot of arguments.
“I would always be selfish and use the money we needed to place bets and would inevitably lose it, then we’d have to make do with what little food we had and we would be behind on bills.
“I’d usually be in a bad mood too because I’d lost.”
By this point, James had realised he had a gambling addiction but could not kick the habit.
He said: “It was always a case of, ‘the next one will be a win’ that kept me hooked.
“I lost everything, my relationship, my kids, my home.”
James’ relationship broke down in 2015 and he spent the next two years couch surfing.
He said: “I’d stay with different friends and family over the years and I don’t think that helped because, if I moved around a lot, I wasn’t staying with the same people for too long and it was easier to cover up just how bad the problem was.
“It took another three years for me to stop gambling completely. I had to completely lose everything in my life to finally stop.”
In 2018, after losing some friends due to borrowing money he could not pay back, James finally stopped gambling and started to attend addiction meetings.
He said: “The meetings really helped me but when the first Covid lockdown hit in March 2020, the meetings stopped.
“I was finding it harder and harder to stay on course and, after a while, I relapsed.”
With his credit score on the mend after three years of being financially responsible, James was able to take out loans to gamble.
He said: “It was a slippery slope and getting out of control. I was losing thousands of pounds and my debt was escalating.
“It wasn’t until July this year that I finally stopped. I don’t think there was a particular reason, it was just that I knew it was out of control.”
He added: “I was heading down the same route as before and it scared me.”
After quitting again, James started to upload videos about his journey to TikTok.
He said: “I had already been using the app and had seen other people make similar videos.”
He added: “I hoped that by sharing my experience it would make me more accountable and less likely to fall back into old habits.
“One of the videos talking about my past went viral and people started reaching out to me, asking how they can stop too, which spurred me to make more videos.”
But James admits his videos have also gained negative feedback.
He said: “I do get hateful comments too. People say I was selfish for what I did and I hold my hands up and agree with them.
“I think there’s a judgement attached with gambling addictions because it’s not a physical addiction so people see it as a choice.
“I was trapped when I was gambling – it wasn’t a choice I wanted to make but I hope I can help other people through TikTok.”
James has also been told that his content has helped other gambling addicts to quit.
He said: “Those kind of messages keep me going. Hearing that I’ve been a factor in someone else stopping is amazing.
“I’ve had friends who hadn’t known about my gambling addiction reach out to me and say ‘well done on spreading awareness.’”
He added: “I think the more people who speak about it, the easier it will be for people to seek help.
“I’m very open about my gambling addiction, even at work, because I’m determined to change and not only learn from what happened but also make sure it never happens again.”
You can follow James’ recovery here: www.tiktok.com/@jwn64