© Provided by The i Jo Mustafa’s hair started falling out due to the stress caused by her gambling addiction. She was diagnosed with alopecia and the bald patch grew so large, she ended up shaving her hair off (Photos: Supplied)

It was an innocuous flutter on the football which first lured Jo Mustafa into the world of gambling believing it was a “fun and easy way” to make money. However, it culminated in her betting day and night and getting into such financial strife, the stress and depression of it all caused her to feel suicidal and her hair began falling out in clumps.

“The way gambling is shown on things like television, they make it look like fun and people may think that it’s a pleasurable way and easy option of getting money to pay their bills,” says Jo.

“But I know from firsthand experience that it doesn’t work like that at all and how gambling can ruin lives … you become desperate and it can spiral into addiction.”

Jo, now 36, began gambling seven years ago and soon found herself hooked on the excitement of winning and it became the sole purpose of her life.

She confesses to i how she gambled constantly, forgoing eating, sleeping and washing herself and even called in sick for work on some days as she knew there’s nothing she wanted to do more with her time than gamble. Even on the days she did go to her then job in a warehouse, she would sneak to the toilets to bet online using her mobile phone.

As her initial wins which enticed her into the world of gambling turned into losses, Jo desperately found herself chasing her losses, convincing herself she was “due a big win” and that her luck was bound to change.

Instead, she found herself spiralling into increasing amounts of debt until she had nothing left and was unable to pay her bills and resorted to selling her possessions to scrape together any money to get her gambling fix.

At her lowest point, Jo, of Luton, Bedfordshire, admits: “I started feeling suicidal and didn’t want to live any more. I didn’t want to see anyone or talk to anyone and didn’t know what to do and felt alone.”

The all-consuming stress and anxiety induced by her compulsive gambling and the way it was negatively impacting on all areas of her life resulted in alopecia, causing Jo’s hair to start falling out in clumps and leaving such a large bald patch that she felt she had no choice but to shave off her hair.

Jo finally managed to seek help for her gambling addiction and has now been gamble-free for a year since suffering a relapse. She shares her story with i as she wants to warn others about gambling harms and the red flags to watch out for amid fears the cost of living crisis will see more people turning to gambling to solve their financial burdens.

Experts are particularly concerned the cost of living pressures will lead to an alarming growth in gambling harms among women as new research reveals one in four women (24 per cent) aged between 18 and 47 who gamble expect to gamble more in the coming months as the crisis bites harder.

One in 10 women (12 per cent) who responded to the research, reported they have already turned to gambling in an attempt to supplement household income.

‘All I wanted to do was gamble’

It started off harmlessly enough for Jo seven years ago when she placed a bet on the football despite admitting she doesn’t even watch football. But by chance, the bet won and it was the start of a slippery slope. “The way I fell into gambling was quite random,” explains Jo. “My stepdad was putting a few bets on the football and I was watching him and thought: ‘I’m going to try that.’

“I only put on a bet of about £10 and I won £25, so it was hardly life changing money. But it made me feel happy and I felt like I was good at it.”

With the winnings in her online account, Jo began exploring the betting site and discovered the online slots. She won a bit and lost a bit playing them and when her initial winnings had run out, she began with putting another £10 in to gamble with.

“Suddenly, I won a few hundred pounds and thought it was amazing,” recalls Jo. “I felt it was so easy to win and gambling online made me feel like I was in this world completely away from everything.”

However, Jo’s luck soon changed and she began losing a lot of money. “I couldn’t accept I wasn’t winning anymore and would convince myself I was due a win soon.

“I would put £50 in and if that didn’t win anything, I’d rationalise it in my brain to put more money in by telling myself my luck was bound to change as I’d not had a win in ages.”

Even when Jo did have a win, she remembers it was never enough and would soon disappear. “I would win £500, but then would talk myself into gambling £400 of it – and when that didn’t win, I’d put more money in and gamble again.”

Soon, everything else in Jo’s life started sliding as gambling became the core purpose of her life. “I would be up all night gambling; sometimes I’d call in sick for work as I’d rather be gambling. Or if I did go to work, I’d go into the toilets and have a gamble.

“I would gamble any time I could; if I was a passenger in a car I’d do it. If someone texted my phone while I was gambling, I’d feel really annoyed as I was in this different world and didn’t want to be interrupted.

“I didn’t bother eating or getting changed or having a wash. Literally, all I wanted to do was gamble. That’s all I was interested in.

“When I finished gambling sessions, I’d realise all the day and night had gone and I had no money left.”

When Jo had spent all her money, she realised she could charge gambling deposits to her mobile phone so racked up an £800 phone bill. She increased her overdraft to £5,000 and spent it all on gambling.

When all avenues of money had been exhausted, Jo sold her possessions, including her guitar and a mobile phone. But financially, things had become so bad, she couldn’t afford to pay any of her bills such as for her car or vet bills for her dog.

“At this point, I was living at home,” explains Jo. “My mum and stepdad helped me out after I told them about the gambling and gave me some money to help me pay my bills and ease my overdraft.

“But I just spent it all on gambling. My mum took my bank card off me for a little while to see if that would help me stop. But there’s plenty of other ways to gamble without a bank card and I found them all.”

Jo began feeling depressed and suicidal and recognised she needed help and desperately started googling to see what help was out there for her gambling. “I didn’t even know gambling addiction was a thing,” she admits. “I even spoke to my doctor about it at one point, but it wasn’t very helpful as I was just told I was a compulsive gambler and to refer myself to services.”

Eventually, Jo discovered Gordon Moody, a charity which helps people tackle gambling addiction and rebuild their lives.

Jo managed to get a place on their female retreat where she learned about why she gambled, what can trigger it, as well as coping strategies. She slowly rebuilt her life and stopped gambling for a while and moved into a flat where she managed to pay her own bills. “I was still in debt, but I had some money in my overdraft and was able to pay my own bills and stay in the flat.”

However, Jo says she got into a toxic relationship where her partner would encourage her to gamble, even though she knew she had a problem. She soon fell back into gambling again and when she had spent every penny she had and couldn’t afford to pay rent on her flat, she was forced to move back home with her mum and stepdad.

It was soon after moving back home that Jo noticed her hair was starting to fall out and it began coming out in clumps, leaving a large bald patch. “It was horrendous and felt like the worst thing in the world,” remembers Jo. “One of my worst fears was to have no hair as I’d always been used to having shoulder length hair.

“Losing my hair totally freaked me out – and it increased my gambling as well and I went back to full-on gambling as I felt suicidal and depressed and didn’t want to be here. That’s when I knew I desperately needed help.”

Jo was diagnosed with alopecia, a disease which happens when the immune system attacks hair follicles and causes hair loss. Doctors told her it had been caused by stress and she had to have steroid injections in her scalp to try to stimulate regrowth.

“It was horrible and the bald patch started spreading quickly. In the beginning, I was trying to hide it, but it got to the point where it was impossible to do so. I was constantly paranoid about it, so in the end, I made the decision to shave my hair off because I thought it would look better shaved and that I would go around with my new bald head rather than hide away forever.”

Jo’s hair has grown back, but she now keeps it short as when it is longer, more of it falls out. She notices whenever she is stressed, more hair falls out.

Jo contacted the gambling support organisation again and they put her back on the programme. “Once I got rid of the toxic relationship, I was in a much better place and I found the programme more useful this time. I had an outreach worker who contacted me weekly and counselling and therapists.”

Jo took part in another programme to teach her how to rebuild her life after treatment and after a slight relapse last year, she has now been gamble-free for a year.

“I have learnt how to cope better with triggers which give me the urge to gamble,” she explains. “I now want to help other people because when I was at my lowest with gambling, I didn’t have anyone to point me in the right direction.”

Jo is concerned that the cost of living crisis will exacerbate gambling harm as people seek a “quick fix” to help them out of their financial plight. “I know I felt that way when I was in so much debt,” she explains. “I would think to myself: ‘If I can just win, that will solve all my problems and I can pay everything off.’

“But you become desperate and even if you win, it’s never enough and soon disappears. Your mind tells you: ‘I’ve won before, I can do it again.’

“However, it wasn’t all about money for me. It was also because I loved being in this feelgood place where no one could come near me and I wouldn’t feel any emotion at all.”

Jo adds: “The warning signs people need to look out for showing they have a gambling addiction is if they are losing track of their time and life when gambling; are losing interest in things they normally found pleasurable and are spending more than they can afford.”

Gambling charity GambleAware has new data highlighting how the cost of living crisis may lead to a worrying growth in gambling harm among women.

They carried out an online survey of 1,606 women aged 18 to 49 who had gambled in the last month and found that one in four of them expect to gamble more in the coming months due to the cost of living crisis.

One in 10 admitted to already having turned to gambling in an attempt to supplement household income.

One in five of the women questioned said they were already experiencing health challenges such as stress and anxiety due to gambling. The alarming findings have led to GambleAware launching a prevention campaign targeting women to raise awareness of available support for those who might be struggling.

Zoe Osmond, chief executive of GambleAware, tells i: “This new research raises serious concerns over the potential growth in the scale of gambling harm over the coming months.

“With such a stark warning sign, it is vital more women are made aware of the risks of gambling.

“As financial hardships accelerate amid the cost of living crisis, and the number of women gambling online increases, we are concerned it is creating a perfect storm that may lead to a rise in the number of women experiencing gambling harm.

“This campaign centres around women specifically, as research shows there has been steady growth in female gambling participation, with the number of women receiving treatment for gambling doubling in the past five years.”

Figures from the National Gambling Treatment Service annual statistics reveal that there were 1,134 women receiving treatment for gambling in 2015-16. This had doubled in five years to 2,423 in 2020-21.

The number of men in gambling treatment went up from 4,770 in 2015-16 to 5,780 in 2020-21.

Ms Osmond says: “There is a general lack of awareness around gambling harms amongst women, which can exacerbate harm, leading to shame, guilt and a reluctance for women to seek advice, or present for treatment

“It is therefore critical that we break down the pervasive stigma that prevents too many women from seeking out vital support.”

Dr Linda Papadopoulos, a leading psychologist involved in the campaign, tells i that attitudes to gambling and women remind her about how heart disease was first publicised with people thinking it was just men who were affected.

“People would think of heart attacks and instantly think of men and you would think women were immune to heart disease – but of course, they’re not,” she says. “Gambling is popular among women, but stigma related to it is a big barrier to accessing support.

“There’s a lot of shame and hiding behaviour, but we know there has been a growth in female gambling participation, so this reticence to seek help is a huge issue.

“Gambling harms can impact anyone from any walk of life. It can cause a strain on relationships, affect work and if not addressed, could lead to significant emotional, physical and financial burden.”

When asked why the cost of living crisis is feared to severely affect women when it comes to gambling harm, Dr Papadopoulus explains: “We know the cost of living crisis is going to get worse and that is going to cause greater anxiety. One of the ways people cope with anxiety is escape and avoidance – and women who gamble tell us they do it because it allows them to escape.

“Gamblers tend to remember the good stuff; a bit like selective amnesia. When they think about gambling, they are prone to imagine it will go their way and they forget about the hardship that will come with the losses.

“We also know that in an average household, women tend to make most of the buying decisions.

“It is very alarming that 12 per cent of those who gamble say they are already turning to gambling to supplement household income and there is a real fear more will turn to it due to the cost of living crisis hoping for a windfall.”

If you are worried about your gambling or starting to lose track of time, spending more than you can afford, or hiding your gambling from others, visit: BeGambleAware.org for free confidential support, or call the National Gambling Helpline on 0808 8020 133